Several months ago, I stood in line at Wal-Mart behind two women who were attempting to pay for their groceries. The cashier was growing more frustrated by the minute because the ladies could not speak English. Both were having trouble operating the credit card reader. The ladies were attempting to help each other, which caused more frustration to exude from the cashier. You are supposed to talk loudly to those who don’t speak English, right? Because, speaking English loudly will certainly break the communication barrier….
When it was my turn, the white, blonde cashier looked at me directly and said, “If you come here, you should learn to speak the language.” English, of course. I smiled at her frustration, appearing to remain Switzerland. However, I was far from that little country. Geographically speaking, I was in Brazil. My mental reaction was, “That’s what my people thought when you Englishmen arrived on our shores.”
I’ve even heard those who say, “You should just ‘go home,’ if you don’t want to learn English.” Interesting prospect, if you are an American Indian. Given—I haven’t had the blood test to prove my Native American ancestry, but I have heard the stories passed down through generations from both sides of my family. English was learned out of necessity, because the English were taking over the land. Perhaps it is my twisted sense of humor that finds it laughable when I hear English referred to as the “native language,” when our country was full of tribes with different languages, symbols, and dialects long before English. Oh well…
What I find most interesting is the intolerance continuously exhibited in the community. We want people to be “normal.” Whatever that is….
I suppose I became more aware of how so many people are afraid of “different” after I had my little prince. Caden has a severe speech delay—a derivative of Down syndrome and a repaired hidden cleft palate. Chances are folks will always have a difficult time understanding him, which, I believe, accounts for why he will rarely talk now. He has a communication device; he reserves his voice for home. He is a smart little boy—perceptive, really.
Even more alarming is the abortion rate for those who are diagnosed with Down syndrome prenatally. I’m not going to get into the abortion or an early screening debate here—because, I don’t believe either address the real issue—the fear of having “something” different from societal norms. They fear their child will speak differently, act differently, look differently….
I take pride in knowing so many parents of special needs children are so tolerant. In parallel with immigrants who come to our great country, many of us have to learn a new language to survive (sign language, medical jargon, and educational terms). We seek each other to build support networks. We celebrate holidays that aren’t always found on the calendar like World Down Syndrome Day, etc. We’ve been stared at by those who are not very compassionate as we try to communicate with our non-verbal or verbally limited children.
I was reading an article the other day that talked about disability advocates who promoted inclusion in the educational system; they are now fighting for inclusion in the community. At first thought, both concepts seem to mesh together. Quinn (2013), the author of the article, said, “It makes people face the mirror, and face the contradiction between their professed universal values and how they’re actually implementing them on the ground.” We tout equality, but we want people to speak English or speak to be audibly legible. We say that it’s OK to be different, as long as you’re normal. We pass laws emphasizing inclusion, but jobs for those with disabilities are hard to find.
But, I can proudly say that being different is OK. I’m different. My prince is different. Those ladies at Wal-mart were different. And, we are normal, because we’re redefining it.
Quinn, G. (2013) Disability rights. An important test for open society. Retrieved February 2, 2013 from http://www.opensocietyfoundations.org/voices/disability-rights-important-test-open-society.